My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-7-26) →
Cute Is What We Aim For (16) Forever the Sickest Kids (13) The Rocket Summer (12) Fall Out Boy (11) Paramore (10) Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Tired kids falls asleep more easily →
Same study shockingly reveals that applying a cattle prod wakes them right up again! More grant money is needed to complete the research, please donate what you can.
Woman attacked by bees following car crash →
The insects attacked after she bumbled into a bee farm, slight allergy to stings caused her to break out in hives.
Bill Maher: Not Everything in America Has to Make... →
My Twitter →
nickwild: imtellingit: I give in! I’m still not on Facebook though. You. Faggot. I cannot even begin to explain how much I deeply despise Twitter. And not just the ‘I don’t care what you’re up to’ argument, there’s many other reasons (that I can’t be arsed explaining right know) why I wish it would die a death already. Lighten up, Francis!
Whooooooa perscription medicine for anxiety and...
validation: Hi. We’re friends. Also, stop making me stoned. I was actually hoping to be productive today. Thanks. Mail me some, thanks! :-(
Serial masturbator seized by Willy's in central... →
Representatives of the Willy’s grocery store chain said, “He’s clearly a whack job, but perhaps he just knows how hard it is to beat our prices!”
Woman charged with assault for pulling out... →
Friends close to her think she was upset over new ink-work he had done on his arms, so this is just a simple ‘tit for tat’ situation.
Walrus mates itself to death →
pterodactyls: up-schist-creek: As deaths go, this one gets my seal of approval. At least he died with a porpoise. On the otter hand, a whale of a way dugong. This will certainly give me pause the next time I think of saying, “Go Fuck Yourself” to someone.
Manatee is Spotted in Chesapeake Bay →
Representatives for Rosie O’Donnell unavailable for comment as to why she would wish to swim there.
Indian farmers fight bad monsoon with frog... →
Same-sex frog marriages still invalid in 46 US states, conservatives say it threatens traditional frog family values.
Kirk Considers Running for Obama's Old Illinois... →
Unsure at the moment, as he’s still looking at the pros and Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaans! of the attempt. [Tagline shamelessly borrowed from Fark.com, it was too awesome not to]
Hot dogs could cause cancer →
I never would have guessed that lips and anuses from the slaughterhouse floor were carcinogenic.
Man believes he is God, attempts to rape local... →
Claims in his defence that he merely wanted to ensure the Holy Spirit was inside her.
Walrus mates itself to death →
As deaths go, this one gets my seal of approval.
Man recovering after world's first double arm... →
The surgery was paid in full by the federal government, as all citizens have the constitutional right to bear arms.
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-7-12) →
Fall Out Boy (87) Dope (53) Eluvium (43) The Rocket Summer (43) Disturbed (32) Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz
Teen falls in manhole while texting →
City sez her own stupid 2 blame, OMG, plans to sewer.
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-7-5) →
Dope (12) Godsmack (9) Disturbed (6) Killswitch Engage (3) The Rocket Summer (2) Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz