June 2012
popcornmassacre:
ugh summer
look at my awful tan line
The Sound-Word Index: A Dictionary Of Those Weird... →
“Timmy, your word is AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.”
“May I have the definition, please?”
“Screaming excitement; unbridled delight.”
“May I have the part of speech?”
“Interjection.”
“Can you use it in a sentence?”
“I got the job? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, I got the job!!!!”
Could this be an exchange...
1 tag
Woops.
imjustonekid:
Mom saw porn on the dash.
“Are those people’s butts??”
“Ohhh, it’s just my dash so I can’t control what people put on it…so it might’ve been.” (it was clearly butts)
“Well, you should put a message on there that says ‘no butts please’.”
OKAY. EVERYONE. NO BUTTS PLEASE.
NONE.
NO BUTTS.
Is everyone here aware that when you die...
dontcallmebarry:
sparklefap:
moonlitmagick:
You have the option to be cremated and turned into a vinyl record full of your favorite music?
http://www.andvinyly.com/
i’m not going to join the black parade
i’m going to become the black parade
OH MY GAW
Yes. This.
Why we should use the Oxford Comma
tenderstatue:
bowtiesinthedungeon:
A direct quote from The Times newspaper, talking about a Peter Ustinov documentary and saying that:
“highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector”.
Forever reblog.
Why doesn't everyone understand this? It's not...
mom: you realize normal people don't have such strong feelings about the oxford comma
me: THE OXFORD COMMA IS IMPORTANT
mom: you realize this makes you a nerd
me:
mom:
me: i had a party with the strippers, george bush and barack obama
me: i had a party with the strippers, george bush, and barack obama
me: without the comma, you are implying that george bush and barack obama are strippers
mom:
me:
mom: this isn't normal
reblog if i can message you and awkwardly make...
lolzpicx:
snoopdeer:
why do porn websites have a +1 button i don’t want everyone to know i actually use google plus
Me: How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
Mum: He's black
Me:
Mum:
Me:
Mum:
Me: You look for fresh prints, but oh my god
vunderlaand:
i wanna wax my entire body and be like a seal
You want to be clubbed by Newfie fisherman?
Me cuddling with the person I like: Omg. This is so nice. Lets just hold each other forever and be next to each other. I just want to lay my head on your chest and listen to your heart. Nothing else needs to happen. This is so sweet and romantic. I love cuddling with you.
Me two minutes later: Lol screw this. Take your pants off.
Renowned Hoo-Ha Doctor Wins Nobel Prize For... →
LOL. Oh, Michigan.
jhnbrssndn:
STOCKHOLM—In recognition of her groundbreaking work treating life- threatening diseases of the privates, renowned hoo-ha specialist Dr. Victoria Lazoff was awarded the Nobel Prize in Lady Medicine this week.
Enlarge ImageThe hoo-ha doctor did not even blush once.
The world’s foremost authority on ailments down south, Lazoff led a team of cutting-edge hoo-ha...
